Can I Keep This Life?
by Dr. Michaela Quinn
Summary: Tony Micelli, second baseman for the Cardinals, and Angela Bower, president of Wallace and McQuade, try to work out a relationship. SEASON EIGHT.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Based from the episode, **_**Tony Micelli, This is Your Life.**_

Tony walked up to the door wearing a black tuxedo. He wanted this date to be special since it would be the last time he'd see Angela in a month because he had games all across the country, but none in New York or Connecticut. He took a deep breath before he knocked on her front door. It felt odd to knock on the door when this very house had been his home for eight years. But that was another life. In his reality, Tony and Angela were planning the wedding of their dreams. Here, Angela knew nothing of Tony, but the more time he spent with her made him fall in love with her all over again. After a few minutes, the door opened. Angela stood at the door in a long, ankle length, silky, form fitting, flowing red dress. Her long blonde mane enveloped her shoulders.

"You look beautiful." Tony stated with a knot in his throat. This woman looks like his fiancé, but he has to be careful not to say anything she hasn't told him. But how can he tell her he knows everything about her without making her run away from him?

* * *

When they got to the restaurant, Tony pulled Angela's chair out for her.

"Thank you." She said as she sat down. Tony smiled. "So we're on a date."

"I suppose we are." Tony responded and she laughed.

"I haven't been on a date since-" She paused. "It's been a while."

"Me too." Tony admitted.

"Oh I'm sure you have women flocking all over you."

"Well," he laughed, "there is only one woman who really captured my attention since I married my wife Marie." Angela leaned her elbows on the table.

"Who's that?"

"You don't know her." He replied, smiling.

"I only have one question."

"What?"

"That day you came to my house; how'd you know my favorite dish was linguine alle vongole?" Tony smiled.

"That's a mystery." She picked up her glass of white wine and took a drink.

"So don't tell me." Tony laughed and took a drink.

* * *

When they got to the house, Tony opened Angela's door. He had parked his sports car in her driveway.

"Well," Angela said, "you've met Jonathan. When would you like to get with Samantha?"

"Uhh," Tony started to say.

"You don't want your daughter to meet me?"

"It's not that. I have to leave tomorrow. I'll be gone for a few weeks. We have baseball games all over the United States."

"Oh." Angela's eyes dropped.

"I'll be back, and when I get home we'll get together. You, me, Jonathan and Sam." She smiled.

"Thanks Tony." He watched her unlock the back door and walk inside before he drove away. Tony took out his car phone and called Samantha. Her answering machine picked up.

"Sam, it's your dad. I wanted to see if you'd like to get together. I have to leave for a baseball game, but I'd like to meet with you. I have somebody who'd like to meet you. I love you sweetheart. Bye." He hung up and drove back into Manhattan. He had a beautiful girlfriend, a great career and a wonderful daughter. He had it all.


	2. Chapter 2

Tony was sitting in his hotel in St. Louis when he decided to call Samantha. He walked over to the phone and picked it up to dial.

"Sam?" Tony asked when he heard somebody pick up on the other line.

"Dad?" Sam questioned.

"Yeah, it's me. I'm in St. Louis, I wanted to call and let you know. I'll be home in a few weeks and we can go for dinner."

"Who is the person you want me to have dinner with? Is this a friend of yours?"

"She works with me, but she is also a friend."

"Oh it's a she." Sam's voice perked. "I take it she's more than just a friend; like the other two stepmothers I've had?" Tony sighed, but he knew he deserved that because he'd been married multiple times since Marie died.

"I feel differently about Angela than I ever felt about the others."

"Oh, as if I haven't heard that line before." Samantha said sarcastically.

"Samantha." Tony replied irritated.

"Look dad, sure, I'll have dinner with you and your friend; but that's it. And I'm not calling her mom."

"Nobody is asking you to." Tony responded. "All I want you to do is come to dinner."

"Fine." She sighed. "But I still want to make sure this isn't a trick. I'll be taping things for my newest book."

"You haven't learned that you can trust me yet?" Tony asked.

"You lie, cheat and steal for eighteen years and then you expect me to believe you when you come back one day and buy me a chocolate egg crème?" Sam questioned. Tony shook his head. He knew this would happen; but he had to get Samantha to understand and trust him again. There was a knock on his door. When it opened, there was one of his fellow teammates standing there.

"I have to go for now Sam. I'll talk to you in a few days."

"I'm not just going to be sitting here waiting for you."

"Bye Samantha." Tony hung up the phone and looked at him.

"We have to leave in the next twenty minutes or so to prepare for the game. Everybody else is getting ready and I find you on the phone. Where is your head Micelli? We have to get going!" With that, he walked out of the room and looked down at the phone.

"_My head is with my daughter; if only my body could be there."_ Tony thought.

* * *

Angela sat on the couch working on a campaign when the phone rang. She reached back and picked the phone up.

"Hello?" She asked.

"Angela?" A female voice said on the other end. Angela took her glasses off.

"Mother, what are you doing calling me?" She asked.

"Is that anyway to talk to your mother?" Mona questioned and Angela sighed.

"I'm sorry; I was just waiting on a call from somebody else."

"Tony?" Mona ventured. Angela laid her glasses on the coffee table. "He was cute."

"He promised he could call from the baseball game. He's been gone almost a week and I haven't heard anything."

"Maybe he's busy Angela. He can't spend the entire time he's gone on the phone with you." Angela sighed again.

"But at least a few minutes would be nice."

"Have you called him?" Mona asked. Angela shook her head even though Mona wasn't in the room to see her. She rubbed her forehead with her hand.

"No mother, I haven't called him."

"Do you remember why your relationship with Gary didn't go anywhere?" Mona questioned. "You always expected him to make the move because he's the man, but then the relationship fizzled because he felt that he was doing all the work. You have to call him too. It's the 1990s; no man is going to be upset getting a call from a beautiful woman."

"Thank you mother." Angela smiled.

"I suppose Tony wouldn't mind getting a call from you."

"Thank you mother." Angela replied more sarcastically than she did the first time. "I'll learn eventually."

"Just remember what I said okay?" Mona paused. "I just got home from a date. I'll be going to bed. I think I might come see you and Jonathan in a few weeks."

"Well mother, Jonathan is still in boarding school for another month. If you want to come at the end of the month, he should be home for the summer."

"Good. I'd love to get to spend time with my daughter and grandson." Angela ran her hand over her head.

"What has gotten into you?"

"Nothing; I just know time is short and I want to spend that with my loved ones. I live in London and I miss you."

"Good night mother." Angela said softly.

"Night Angela." She hung up the phone and then looked at the receiver. She wished Tony would call; but maybe Mona was right and she needed to call him. Angela didn't want to seem too forward but she didn't want to lose Tony either. She felt she needed this relationship more than anything. There was something different about Tony. Something she'd never felt before and she wasn't sure what was going on. She was scared, but this was a ride she didn't want to let go on either. She could only take it a day at a time. And she'd start off tomorrow by calling Tony.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: I'm sorry it's taken me almost two months to update.  
**

Tony was nervous standing at Angela's front door. He had been back in Fairfield about a week and he was finally having dinner with his daughter and girlfriend. Tony's teeth were chattering and his knees were knocking. The door opened and Angela stood in the doorway wearing a silk long sleeved blue dress that came down to her knees. Tony smiled gently.

"You look beautiful." She closed the door.

"Thank you," Angela replied softly, "you look nice too." He held out his arm for her to take before walking to the car. As they walked towards his car, she looked at him. "You don't mind having dinner with your daughter do you? I know you were concerned about it before you left for the game." Tony shook his head.

"I love her, and you and I are getting close, so I think you should know her."

"So do I." She smiled.

* * *

Samantha was meeting them at the restaurant that evening; but she was late. When they were shown to their table, Tony pulled out her chair and helped her sit down. Then he pulled out his own chair and sat down. Angela looked around the fancy restaurant in Manhattan.

"This is wonderful, but it's so expensive. We don't have to be here Tony." He laughed and put his napkin on his lap.

"I want to do this for you and Samantha. Don't worry about that Angela." Tony said and she nodded.

"Okay." She replied. Tony stopped the waiter.

"Can we get a bottle of Dom Perignon?"

"Of course sir." He walked off.

"Champagne?" Angela asked.

"I have something to celebrate. It's not very often I get to see you or my daughter." He smiled and took her hand in his own. Then, as the waiter came back with the bottle, Sam walked over to the table. Angela smiled.

"You must be Samantha. I'm glad to finally meet you."

"Yeah," Sam replied. She slumped down into the chair with her arms crossed. "I wasn't too thrilled about having to come; but dad was talking about how things were supposed to get better between us."

"Things could be better Sam." Tony stated. Samantha glared at him.

"You never wanted to be a father before; why change that now?"

"Samantha." He warned.

"If things are going to be like this, I'm going home."

"No, please stay, Sam is it?" Angela asked and Samantha sighed.

"I guess I could always go with a free meal." She put her tape recorder on the table. "I'm taping this. I have a second book to work on."

"I have seen you on TV promoting your books. It's very interesting that you are so passionate about writing." Angela tried to say nicely. Samantha shrugged.

"I guess so." The waiter had finished pouring the glasses and cautiously walked away from the table. "So you are my dad's latest project huh?"

"What?" Angela asked confused. She looked between Tony and Samantha.

"He's been married three times. I'm sure he told you." Angela nodded.

"Your father's personal life is not exactly a secret to me. I know your mother died when you were younger-" Angela started. Samantha laughed.

"He left us long before Mom died. I've been living in his place in Palm Springs. He has two ex-wives and they are living in his other condos."

"Where did you live after your mom died?" Angela questioned.

"Dad made me come stay with him. I'd rather have gone to a shelter." Samantha narrowed her eyes at him.

"I thought we were trying to make things better." Tony stated.

"I'm sorry, but I can't sit here and pretend that everything is okay." Tony nodded at Samantha's statement.

"I know that. I have made plenty of mistakes in your life Sam, and I'm sorry about that. But please help me to work things out starting now." He said. Sam nodded.

"Fine." He smiled.

"Good," he paused, "so to start again. Sam, this is Angela Bower. Angela, this is my daughter Sam."

"Hi Sam." She stuck out her hand for Samantha to shake.

"Nice to meet you." Samantha replied. Tony smiled as he looked at Angela and squeezed her hand.

"Shall we order?"

* * *

Samantha, Tony and Angela walked out of a restaurant in Brooklyn.

"Dad, you came all the way to Brooklyn for a chocolate egg crème?"

"They are your favorite, I wanted to do something special for you." He replied.

"It was really good." Angela chimed in.

"This was the favorite part of my childhood." Samantha smiled. "I'd come after school and eat them. Then Dad might come see me sometimes and eat one with me."

"Not all our memories were bad." Tony said.

"No, you weren't a HORRIBLE father; but you weren't the easiest either. Definitely not father of the year." Tony nodded as Samantha spoke.

"I agree, but I want you and me to be able to start over. Has too much time passed or can we do that?"

"I think we can." She walked over to her car. "I should be going home. I have to take this and write it up for my newest chapter."

"What's that Sam?" Angela asked curiously.

"Can you ever restart a relationship?" Samantha replied staring at her father. She glanced down at Tony's hand still intertwined with Angela's.

"Bye Sam." Tony said. She got into the car and they walked down the street.

"Lovely girl." Angela stated and Tony nodded.

"Maybe we should have waited a little while. She is still upset with me because of everything that happened. Until a while ago, I was the father she wrote about in her book."

"What changed?" Angela asked. "I saw a difference in the way you were just with me from when I first started working with you until the last time we were together."

"I realized what I was doing with my life."

"And what was that?" Angela turned to look at him, waiting for his reply.

"I was pushing everybody away and I shouldn't have. So I'm trying to make it up to everybody in my life," Tony sighed, "I have a lot to do, but I want to." Angela smiled and kissed his cheek.

"I don't think I know you very well yet, but I am going to love spending the time with you and getting to know you," she said, "when is your next game?"

"We have several games in the area. When I'm anywhere between Maine and Virginia; Delaware to Ohio, I won't have to leave you because it won't be as far away." He sighed. "Do you want to go with me to the penthouse?" Angela's eyebrows raised.

"Why?"

"Just to look around," he said, "why? Do you have something else in mind?" Angela quickly shook her head.

"No, of course not. I was asking because I didn't want you to get the wrong idea."

"I don't want you to get it either. I really do like you Angela." He said and she nodded.

"I do too." She walked towards the car door and got in. She liked him, but she wasn't really sure if she fit in his world. Things were so different for them, would it actually work?

**A/N: I want to thank my supporters- Dimples73, Sand N' Sable, Imaginer.012, Stayathomemum,Tangela13, GoldenGirlSherry, kirsty2765 and No-Rhyme-Just-Reason for their constant support. Without them, I probably would have quit writing a long time ago. Thank you all! Love ya guys! :) **


	4. Chapter 4

Tony was on his way to Angela's house when his car phone rang.

"Hello?" He asked after the second ring.

"Dad?" Samantha asked.

"Sam?"

"Who else calls you dad?" She paused. "Don't answer that. I'd rather not know."

"Samantha, why'd you call?"

"Oh I wanted to tell you how I noticed your happiness with, what's her name? Angela?"

"Yeah."

"I was watching you that night and I noticed how you looked so happy around her. She looked happy and her eyes sparkled when she looked at you."

'You think so?"

Yes."

"I love her Sam."

"I know you do. I can tell you had admiration for her. She is the closest person to you that I've ever seen, besides Mom."

"I loved your mom Sam, more than anything in the world."

"I know." She paused for a long time after that. "Are you going to marry her?"

"I don't know Sam. I really do love her. If she would ever agree to marry me I'd be grateful."

"You are happiest with her around dad. Don't let her go."

"Do you really feel that way?"

"I know it's odd. You've been married and divorced three times since Mom died." Sam paused. "But I do feel that you really are happy. Before you were searching for happiness, but she's holding it for you."

"Would you be willing to have dinner with us? I'd like you to meet her mother and son Jonathan."

"I really can't dad, but thank you for asking."

"Sam, I want to be part of your life, if I marry Angela I want you to be a part of that."

"Look, we haven't been in each other's lives for years. Let's not push ourselves onto each other, okay?" Tony sighed.

"I guess."

"I like having you around Dad, but it's weird because you've never been there before. We'll start out slowly, but I really think you should continue your relationship with Angela. She seems nice."

"She is." He smiled. Tony was glad to see Angela and Sam getting along, but he wished there wasn't the tension between him and Samantha.

"I have to meet with my publisher. Bye." She hung up and Tony hung up after a few seconds.

"Bye sweetheart." He tossed the phone in the seat as he pulled into Angela's driveway. "I've alienated my own daughter. How can I make things right? I need Sam to know I'll always be there. But I haven't been for so many years." He smiled when he saw Angela coming out of the back door. "After some time I will ask Angela to be my wife."

* * *

**A/N: I'm sorry it's so short and 99% dialogue, but I thought this would just be a nice chapter to have.**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: I'm so terribly sorry that it's been almost a year since I posted a chapter :( That won't happen again. This story only has two chapters left (including this one), so it won't take me long at all to finish :) SPOILER: It's definitely a sad chapter :( **

Tony walked from the bathroom into the sitting/living room of his condo when the phone rang.

"Tony?" A female voice cried out when he answered it.

"Yes... Angela? Is that you? What's wrong?"

"Can I meet you somewhere? We need to talk."

"That's never good Angela. Please tell me what's wrong."

"Can you come here or do you want me to meet you in the city?"

"You sound too upset to be driving anywhere. I'll meet you in Fairfield. But I have to tell you that I'm worried."

"I'll see you when you get here." Angela hung up the phone leaving Tony looking at the receiver in his hand. After a moment or two, he hung up and looked down at his charcoal gray robe. He knew he'd have to change before he left. Tony jumped into the show and put on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. He really liked Angela, but he was starting to miss HIS Angela- bossy, self-confident, over worked Angela. He felt he didn't need to impress her, plus it didn't feel like a suit and tie kind of moment. Instead of allowing his drive to take him, Tony opted for the subway to get to the train station and then he'd just call a cab when he got into Fairfield. The hour trip gave him time to think about what he'd say, but the problem he couldn't get off his mind was- what would Angela say?

* * *

She opened the door when Tony got there. Angela's hair was bunched up on top of her head in a bun and she was wearing a gray sweatshirt and jeans.

"I'm glad you're here. I wasn't sure how much longer I could be cooped up alone in this house." Tony noticed Angela was really jittery as they walked around the living room.

"Angela, can you calm down long enough to tell me what's wrong?" She looked at him, but Tony felt it was more like she was looking through him. "You can tell me. We're friends."

"I can't do this anymore."

"What?" Tony asked as his jaw dropped. "What do you mean?"

"This... We can't be together. I don't fit into your world Tony. I've tried, but we both have to realize that I never did. You are an important ball player with all kinds of people after you. I'm working for some advertising agency."

"Not just 'some advertising agency.' You are the president of the twelfth largest advertising agency in the country. Angela, what's changed between us? I thought things were going so well. We seemed happy. You liked Samantha and she was really starting to like you. Can't we try and work something out?"

She shrugged with a sigh. "We might have been together another time, but we can't now. I know we're in different groups, classes, of people. I can't stay with you because that would hurt you."

"And you think this doesn't hurt?" he pleaded.

"Please Tony, I don't like doing it either. The best way to do this is just to cut it off completely. Please go." She walked over and opened the door. Reluctantly Tony left closing the door behind him. Of everything he imagined possible, this was definitely the worst.


	6. Chapter 6

"You miss him," Mona said making herself a cup of coffee at Angela's.

"What do you mean?"

"Tony, Angela," she paused, "you had a man who wanted you to be a part of his life. He introduced you to to his daughter- that's more than just friendship dear. You gave away one of the best relationships you've ever had."

"It wasn't a relationship. We were just friends Mother."

"I'm sure," Mona replied. "He was great for you. He loved Jonathan and we all really liked him. How could you let that slip away from you?"

"Why don't you go home?"

"I would, but my plane doesn't leave for several hours. We're together for the long haul."

Angela sighed, "great."

"You didn't have a problem being around me right after Michael left you and got married again and you needed help raising Jonathan. Or how about all the calls I got when Michael had affair after affair?"

"That was different."

"Yeah, you needed somebody to take care of the kid, but now that it's just you it doesn't matter to you. You're still my daughter and I love you. He made you happy and you completely burned that bridge."

"Will you please let me take care of my own love life please?" She asked irritatedly.

"Fine, just don't say I didn't try." Mona walked out the back door leaving the kitchen and through the quiet living room. Angela sat on the couch and held the pillow in her arms. Was this just another time that she pushed love away? Could there ever be anything with Tony? She truly wanted to say yes, but she couldn't say anything to him. Maybe it was best to leave things be.

* * *

"Have you called her Dad?"

"She said it was over. I don't want to continue to bother her. Maybe she's right Sam. I'm always gone, it couldn't work out with her. Your mother and I had similar problems too."

"How'd you guys figure it out?" Sam asked.

"I took you on games with me for a while. I wanted her to know I loved her even if I was always gone."

"Can't you do the same thing with Angela?"

"I'm not Sam, end of story."

"Fine, but I must think you are both being childish. Just get back together. This would be your fifth marriage, so I wouldn't support it unless she really meant something to me. Angela completes you Dad, I haven't seen you happier then when you were with her."

"I don't know what I'll do without her."

"Come on Dad, it'll be okay."

"Angela and I just quit seeing each other all together, I never really even got to say goodbye. I'm mourning a loss here Sam."

"I know. But what exactly happened? What'd you do? I knew you'd end up screwing it up. The only marriage you didn't destroy was yours and Mom's."

"Samantha!"

"It's true," she defended.

"Sam, I didn't hurt the relationship with Angela. She said we couldn't be together because we were in different social classes."

"That's crazy. You are both in good standing as citizens. She's good for you, really good Dad, and you seem to be good for her as well."

"I think I am. The five of us were always a good math, we could do it again."

Sam laughed, "I'm not sure who those five people are Dad, but go after her if you want her."

"Maybe it wasn't meant to be. I tried to make it work, but I can't control my life."

"Dad?"

"Oh Sam," Tony said forgetting he was talking to her. "I've got to go. I'll talk to you soon." He hung up the phone. "I was wrong... so wrong."

* * *

Tony woke up in bed, but had to blink several times and look around trying to get his bearings. he got out of bed and realized he was wearing a pair of red, plaid boxers and a white tank top. Was it possible? He rushed out of the bedroom and down the stairs finding himself in Angela's living room. Immediately, he rushed into the kitchen and saw Angela sitting at the table with a cup of coffee and a glass of orange juice.

"Angela?" She turned to him and smiled.

"I wondered if you were okay. It's so late for you to be getting up," she looked at her watch. "I'm just about to leave for the train; if Mother will get in here."

"Mona's here?!"

Angela nodded, "yes, she better be. We have work today."

"So you do have your own agency?"

"Tony, did you hit your head or something? I've had my own agency for several years now thanks to you." She rinsed her cups out in the sink after taking her final drink. Angela kissed him and rubbed her hand over the back of his head. "You feel fine."

"Jonathan? Where's Jonathan?" Tony questioned making her laugh.

"He left for school already."

"But he lives here?" She nodded again.

"He's my son, where else would he live?" She paused, "I know that wedding plans have been causing you some stress, but I think you need some more sleep."

"Wedding plans?"

"Okay, now I know something's not right. We've been planning our wedding for months Tony. I think you need to schedule an appointment and get your head checked."

Tony nodded, "I'll do that." Mona walked in through the kitchen door and looked at them.

"Hello, how are the love birds this morning?"

"Slightly confused," Angela responded and looked at Tony once more, "come on Mother." They walked out the door and Tony slid into a kitchen chair.

"I'm back," he smiled, "I'm really back."

* * *

**A/N: Not the original way that I planned on ending it, but I think it's nice enough :) Now please, if you're reading this, can I receive some kind of feedback? I've been updating stories lately and nobody's said anything.. I'm not sure anybody's reading anymore... It looks like ALL my stories could be completed by Christmas :) (With 2016 starting new stories :))**


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